You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
operation harelip BJ is a go
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize