Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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