Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
why is half of my head shaved?
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