Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize