last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
My brain says no but my pants say off.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
