I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize
