A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize