He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I need a burrito and a hug.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
