Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
