True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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