I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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