..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
