I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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