It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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