dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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