I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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