it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
