loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
