I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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