I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
