Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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