Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Randomize
