Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
