My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
