i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
