Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
