Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
