your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
