It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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