I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I CAN MOONWALK!
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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