awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
