Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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