Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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