No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
