Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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