Your tits are I can't wait for
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
