K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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