16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
