what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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