Jerry, you need to find god
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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