Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
