I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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