And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
