Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
