Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize
