I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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