She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize