wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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