I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize