I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
